[F-Diary] #5 FRI 30 AUG - It gets darker 😱

It's the 5th day. The fingers remained swollen - though not as bad as the first couple of days.

I guess, the regular rubbing er... massaging of the finger tips have helped the blood circulation. 

Can move the fingers a bit though the movement is largely hindered by the bandage that goes all the way up.

The bruise is the "damage" done.... hopefully, with more regular massaging, it will be gone soon... 🤞

[F-Diary] #4 THU 29 AUG - A different Teachers' Day "celebration"

Teachers' Day Celebration is never something that's extraordinary to me - through many see it as a day that their students show gratitude. Hm... I envy? Not really. It goes back to what I believe in. Teachers' Day could fall on any day - that makes me feel having made a significant impact on others. 

We don't really need a day to remind others so show gratitude, I feel. I don't need a day when those who have made me upset, angry and tired of chasing work from them to ask for forgiveness or to "thank" me for teaching them. 

On STUDENTS....

It would be a real celebration when it comes from those who genuinely feel so. Today, I could hardly see this - from most students. You are given a present because it's a day marked out for those who follow the crowd to go through the motion. Because it's a day when all are reminded it's time when I should give my teacher something because it's a day marked out so. What's valuable - to me - is the thought behind, to express the appreciation and being able to articulate why this token of appreciation. "Happy Teachers' Day" is easy to say...  We hear lots of these from students on the celebration day - how many today truly knows what it means when saying this to someone. How many of these "Happy Teachers' Day" sound really sincere? deep from the heart? Hm.... 

The choice of gift... need not be expensive. It could be just a handwritten card... with some heartfelt words written. That suffice. to me more practical - save me from wasting time chasing work from you. 

Genuine or not, I believe the recipient can feel it.

For COLLEAGUES....

I can't recall.... since when, I started to give my jobholders or partners-at-work books as Teachers' Day gift. Books require one to curate its suitability. It also carries the message that I hope to convey, some messages or encouragement that they can interpret when they read. While I like to tell others that I like to buy and shelf, and only read when the need arises, I read/ went through all the books that I gave out as Teachers' Day gift because I think the messaging is important - and I trust that, if the reader has read it and if we have built the kind of relationship and partnership, no matter how simple the "picture" book is, he/ she would have felt it as they "chew" through the words or the pictures it carries.

To get books, it cannot be a last minute purchase, it has to be planned. It is intended... and books are not cheap, actually - but it carries weight that one can keep and revisit...

These are the books I gave this year. 

and one more...  for someone who's been in close genuine  partnership since the early years here - picked something that I hope to further encourage someone I value a lot here. 

I penned words of gratitude in those for my JHs since the books arrived in early Term 3. Yes, it was even in time for one who left in end-July. The book went to her. The books were just waiting for the occasion to be given out to create a bigger meaning to them (that I hope to). Nevertheless, I procrastinated for the ones meant for the SLs. Actually, it's about procrastinated to put my words in gratitude properly... as a result, it's the first time I gave a book without a single ink mark left on it. I learnt - just do it... and live like no tomorrow... accidents do happen - and it has deprived my ability to write proper these few weeks. 

Do I only give "presents" on Teachers' Day? 

Bitesize encouragements and token of gratitude go out as and when it's possible.

I also learn to manage - not to overdo it - though I wanted to thank people, but I don't want them to take it for granted.

Over the years, I also learnt to be more explicit on telling people what's this little token meant for... because of their hard work, their contribution and for their well being.

I notice some people don't know that it's a token of appreciation or expression of care.

Sometimes, people don't reciprocate - hm... maybe we have not truly established that relationship yet. Nevermind, I've expressed what I wish to.... 

From COLLEAGUES....

A very pleasant surprise came from a colleague who loves to bring food to the table on days that we need some warmth and care... I did not expect this... so thoughtful of her for the treat. I was not left forgotten... Really appreciate it to ensure that I had a share of the food (from her own pocket)! Thank you,  Lai Fong 🙏

[F-Diary] #3 WED 28 AUG - Tuning in

Feel the pain... due to swelling.

See the bruise! Scary...  started with the middle finger... blame it on the dressing?

Hm.... I forgot to rub my fingers for blood circulation. I probably have not put it on the sling long enough? Oh! It knew I cheated and rested it out of the sling?

For the next few days, I shall keep it close to me, with the sling.

Does this look like a lamb leg? 🐑 🤣

[F-Diary] #2b TUE 27 AUG - Ready for a new phase...

 Learnt to use up on my own, single handedly.

I grow to appreciate more of my left hand, left wrist, left elbow, and left arm.

Thanks to my right wrist fracture! 

First time having a good look at my bandaged elbow.

Starting to learn how to appreciate things that I've taken for granted... without knowing it...

Received this from the school in the evening.

[F-Diary] #1b MON 26 AUG - I'm back...

The swelling came in the evening becomes less and less bearable. Decided to make a trip back to the A&E department. It was less than 12 hours after I left.

It was a huge contrast to the morning... so crowded, and filled with lots of children noises. To my surprise, many of the kids were calm... were they still in shock? or they could be easily distracted away from the pain? I wonder.

The wait was close to 2 hours. 

Some people were counting and monitoring the wait time and the number of patients being served - trying to draw some inferences to make out some patterns. Haha... interesting. 

Was close to 2330 when it's my turn.

Was attended to by a quite senior looking doctor, Dr Lim.

He examined and agreed the bandage was a bit too tight, leading to the swelling around the fingers area. He also volunteered why it needed to be very tightly dressed in the morning because the key was to ensure the bones were held tight in the position, which is the priority at that point of time. I understood. I am not angry with what I may inferred to be "a less than ideal job" done. I appreciated this info, and made me feel more grateful to the doctors who treated me in the morning.

I guess, that's teamwork, recognising patients' ignorance and helped to give greater clarity to the intent.

He also gave assurance when he looked at the Xray took in the morning and commented that the alignment was quite neatly done. This gave me further assurance. Relieved, at least. He also shared it may take another 4 to 6 weeks to recover. OK, that piece of info is useful!

It was close to 2.30 am when I'm eventually home.

[F-Diary] #1 MON 26 AUG - The Day

It was supposed a happy occasion - the staff breakfast at the atrium marked the week long celebration of the staff appreciation week. We spoke about going to the floor ball match that we missed last Wed. 

It was at around 8am.

Stepped out of the stairs, turned right... and there my right foot tripped over something hard, a metal structure that's too close to the corner! The 2 cups flew off my right hand. Fell with the right of the body landing on the ground first. Then a sharp pain at my right wrist. 

A look at my wrist - deformed! FRACTURED? I thought. 

Very quickly, help came. 

Guohui and Mui Luan acted very swiftly.

"Do not move her." they intercepted when someone asked if I could stand up.

"Are you ok? Do we feel giddy?"

I was fully conscious - the pain came from my wrist and my kneecaps (as there were the places that hit the ground hard (enough). But, fortunately, there was no other physical injuries. 

I was calm. 

Chopsticks, elastic bandages and the triangular bandage came. We were first aid trained. Real world application! I knew I was in safe hands as I told people around that they were qualified first aider... haha... to add a little jest for the onlookers, assuring them that I was ok. Painful? Yes, it was manageable. I could feel the sweat on my head, that I know the amount/ extent of pain that my body is managing. Yup, the worst so far experienced this year was when I had to walk with unbearable pain on my left foot when my blouse was soaked in sweat by the time I reach the MRT station after a 10-min walk.

Jokes aside, the more important things came to my mind - the test paper review with S1-01 and the Bandung trip.

• The lighted moment was who to "arrow" to replace me for the trip 😂 For this, I'm not worry as there were still a few days before departure, and I had done the key things I took charge of - the RAMS, and I had also passed the luggage tags that I took from the SQ counter to Priscilla in the morning. 
• What I was more concern with was the script review. Fortunately, the reflection papers were printed and on my table, and the materials are all in the school, and the results were already entered into the system. 

Thankful to the colleagues who swung into action so quickly. A wheelchair was already at standby to ferry me to the staff room. Oh yes, to my surprise, the 2 cups, gifts from colleagues survived the drop! Grateful that Keith helped to picked them up and offered to wash them, and even asked whether I would still like to have some food.

Having a clear and calm mind was definitely very helpful. I don't think I was in a shock for long - perhaps, that short few seconds - the fall that lasted for that few seconds. Once helped to sit up, my mind already started to race in a very systematic manner and directed the assistance I needed, including what must go with me to the hospital - my bag, my phone and the computer; who I need to seek help to go class, where to get the stuff, what else was needed (e.g. mark sheet). 

Grateful to Karen Teo who was there by my side from atrium to General Office to the hospital. 

And yes, Doreen who found my device and chauffeured me to NUH, with Karen Ng, despite they had a meeting at NP at 9am.

Thought, I think it's very "me" to look at the more optimistic side of things - that prob also help to distract me from the pain. Certainly, the people around helped a lot - more importantly, they are calm, too...

***

The A&E department was unusually quiet, I thought. Only one person ahead of me. 

This caught my attention, Payment was made. I wonder, what if someone's here but can't afford the payment - pay first or treat first?

I was quite quickly attended to. The doctor... I supposed, is the gatekeeper to decide how serious the situation is to direct the cases - commented that the dressing was very neatly and professionally done. Kudos to our 2 first aiders 👍

The examination and X-ray confirmed that it was a fracture. 

Attended by Dr Poh, the A&E doctor who's on duty. She was quite obliging when I requested for the photos of the X-rays, etc. I was then attended by Patrick Kong, the senior resident doctor and tried of the situation. A seemingly "seasoned" doctor in handling wrist fractures, listing the 3 ways to approach the treatment, omitting surgery: ^Hematoma block (local anaesthesia at the wrist area), zonal (for the entire arm) and sedation - the degree of risks increases as the region is extended. The treat is the same - the pull. After some deliberations, I didn't to go for hematoma block that Dr Kong recommended. The area turned numb. Though I could feel the pull, and the pressing around the wrist area, I did not actually feel the pain. 

^Hematoma blocks are considered a relatively simple, safe, and effective technique in the acute setting to provide sufficient anesthesia and allow for closed reduction of displaced distal radius fractures

... before treatment to check on the injury 

... after the pull and put on half cast

By 12noon, I was discharged, with a half cast.

I was told that the next appointment would be next Monday, to see the bone surgeon.

***

Life that depends on the left arm began the moment I stepped out of the emergency ward. 

Being organised and plan ahead helps a lot. 

Bought the arm sling and had it adjusted - but later, I learned that it is still not as effective as the triangular bandage. Human skill to tie it matters more.

The afternoon was a busy one.... just because I have to get things organised in my absence. 

I guess.... I've "withdrawn" so much from my Emotional Bank Account - I am grateful for that. 

I am grateful to many people - especially those whom need to take over my duty - from classroom lessons to the trip duty - direct and indirect. E.g. Janet has to be activated to fill my place. Doreen in turn has to take over Janet's role to manage any emergency call. It's a domino effect.

There are many people to thank - for their help and support, and understanding for the inconveniences arise from the incident. 

Back at home.... not to take for granted the support and help available - to help me with my daily activities, including taking showers. 

Am grateful to my left hand when my dominant hand goes for a break.